I'm sad to report that you cannot romance the space octopus in Exodus, the Matthew McConaughey-starring space opera RPG from former BioWare devs

cowards

Totally random tangent, but while you can’t romance the villagers in Animal Crossing, either… there was a pink octopus who kept hitting on my character. Like one time she ran up as soon as I started the game and asked to visit my place, then after that event, immediately asked me to visit hers. And she sent a bunch of lovey-dovey letters. I showed my wife and she almost didn’t believe they were automatically generated by an NPC! She still doesn’t like that animal villager in particular — her name’s Marina. I wanna invite her back to my new island, see if she hits on my girl villager character. Maybe she’s just that friendly?

You can’t romance any villager in Animal Crossing, but the game does not stop you from taking your clothes off in their house and laying on their bed in your underwear. I may or may not have done this, screenshotted it, and pasted the title screen information over it and told my wife “look where my character woke up.”

Animal Crossing may seem innocent, but it has nudity in it (in the art; you can also get an uncensored statue of David and place it on your island) and the game may or may not be secretly post-apocalyptic…